Theme : Busy June Holiday


Introduction - My Life So Far


My six months of 2007 are filled with different moments . I experienced happy , sad , lonely , and stressful moments . There were times where i would feel hopeless , like the whole world was about to fall apart . Other times , I could be in high spirits , and wish for nothing more . I would think positive and negative , many times scaring myself with my thoughts . I know there is a saying 'think positive' , but somehow i cant help myself of thinking of the worst possible things that could happen .

As the exams drew nearer , I started to worry more and more . I wondered how I was going to do , would i finally get the results i want ? I studied hard especially during the last few weeks . I was really stressed up , I have never really studied hard for any exam . I thought I did fairly well , but the results shocked me . I had failed 1 subject , and my others were not as good as what I had expected . I guess it was my ownself to blame for the last minute studying . As must as i regret , there is nothing i can do to turn time back . All I can do now is hope that I will do better for the end of years . I know i have not put in enough effort , and i am not the kind of person that will study everyday . This will be a challenge I have to take , to start paying attention in class instead of day dreaming , and studying bit by bit everyday . My goal is to please my parents with great results , I really upset them this time . I know i can do much better than what i have done , and i will try my best to do better the next time .

My friends have always been by my side , when i am happy or sad . They are always there to encourage me , and make me feel better . Sometimes, we would go out together to enjoy ourselves . Other times , we would study together and they would help me with subjects I am weaker in . For example , Zheng Ting would help me with my maths , I am really poor in it . I am so lucky to have such a good friend !

Friends forever , friends for life .

However , my family are not as encouraging as my friends . When my mother knew about my results , she just nagged non stop , and kept telling me how stupid I am . Sometimes , I wish she could be more encouraging , and tell me more about my good points than bringing me down with all my bad points . I envy other parents who give their children encouragement when they have not done well for their exams . Every now and then , she would remind me of how I have fared for my mid years , and it would make me think of it again . I know she cares for me , but how I wish she would show her concern in a more loving way like other mothers do , instead of bringing me down .

School has been about the same everyday , it's like something a cycle I have to go through everyday . Sometimes I would think how meaningless school life is , what is the use of going to school everyday ? The things you learn there , it doesn't even help you in your daily life . We go to school just to get a degree so that we can get a job next time . Is that what going to school is for ? How boring . Well I guess there is a proper answer to it , but up till now , i still don't know what it is .

I have gone through good and bad times , many a times when i felt like giving up . My bad times are usually when i quarrel with my mother . It used to happen almost everyday , and i would lock myself in my room . Almost everytime , I would cry after every fight as i hardly won any . I feel like my mother is someone who blocks all my freedom . She would interfere with everything I do . When I get a phone call or sms , she would always question me . Many many questions . I feel that I have no privacy in anything I do . So now , I usually make calls only when she is not at home . How I wish that my mother will have more trust in me .

Other bad times are usually because of my brother . Somehow , we do not get along well . We are different in many ways and everything he does is to annoy me . For example , when I am watching television , he would come and snatch the remote control from me and change the channel . When I am using the computer , he will switch it off just to irritate me . I don't know how to express my hatred towards him but I am sure of one thing , I hate him more than anything else .

This year , I hope to get the top 5 in class . I will work hard to get it , and try my best to reach it . I will do my part by not dreaming in class anymore and start taking notes . I hope to put a smile on my parents face with my end of year results .

I do not know what i want to be when i grow up yet , there is nothing i really have interest in now . Mr Low once told us that everyone has a talent , and I am sure that I have one too . It's just that i have not found out what it is yet . When the day comes that I find out what it is , I will strive to improve it , to become someone whom people look up to .

love!JESSE.

tagboard here